Being in Love In Elul

The month of Elul presents an opportunity to improve our relationship both with Hashem and our spouse. (For mobile site click "listen in browser.")

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: The Man Cave

Sometimes a man needs space. The best thing to do when he goes into his cave is nothing! For mobile site, click "Listen in browser."

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: Ride the Wave

Relationships have normal ups and downs. If you can accept this, you will experience more love and less fear. For mobile site, click "Listen in Browser."

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: Transcending Nature

Rising above our natural human inclinations is more meaningful than we may realize. For mobile site, click "listen in browser."

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: All Abut the "I"

Looking at yourself instead of blaming others is difficult but rewarding. For mobile site click "Listen in Browser."

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: More on "Adjust How you See it"

For the second step of WAIT, adjust the way you see what happened.

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: More on "What do I Need?"

  Noticing and changing your inner dialogue is an important way to nurture yourself.

For mobile site, click "Listen in browser."

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: When you feel hurt, WAIT.

Instead of immediately reacting, remember the acronym WAIT. For mobile site, be sure to click on "Listen in browser."

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: Shabbos Candles Illuminate the Corners

The Shabbos candles bring love into our home. (For mobile site, click "listen in browser".)

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: Create a Vision

Creating a vision gives you a goal to look towards whenever you need to get back on track.

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: The Power of Empathy

Genuine empathy is one way we can imitate Hashem and create a wonderful relationship with our loved ones.(For mobile site click "Listen in browser.")

SHALOM BAYIS MOMENTS II: Imitating Hashem

Our husband provides us with the opportunity to be like Hashem and become closer to Him.

Shalom Bayis Moments # 11: Drop the Expectations

Dropping expectations one at a time makes you happier and more appreciative. Grab a pen and paper before listening! For mobile site, click "Listen in Browser."

Shalom Bayis Moments # 10: Create Your Reality

You have the power to create your own reality. Understanding this can change your relationships. (For mobile site, click "Listen in Browser")

Shalom Bayis Moments #9: Share Your Heart and Discover His

Sharing your true vulnerable feelings is a powerful, even if a bit risky, way to connect. Its worth it! Hearing his heart message brings connection instead of distance. (For mobile site, click "Listen in Browser.")

Shalom Bayis Moments #8: Own Your Happiness Part 2

This is Part 2 of Recording # 2. Self fulfillment is an important aspect of good relationships. (For mobile site click "Listen in Browser.")

Shalom Bayis Moments #7: The Key to Real Joy

This is recording #7 in the series. Enjoy, and feel free to comment below. For mobile site click "listen in browser."

Shalom Bayis Moments #6: Gift of Taking Part 2

This is the sixth recording in the series besides for the Extra. It is Part 2 of Give the Gift of Taking. We discuss skills for helping him understand what you want. (On mobile site click "Listen In Browser".) Hear more Shalom Bayis Moments at ayalashoshan.blogspot.com. 

Shalom Bayis Moments #5: Give the Gift of Taking

This is Audio #5 (besides for the Extra.)  One of the greatest gifts you can give a spouse and yourself  is learning how to be a taker. (For mobile site click Listen in Browser.). Hear more Shalom Bayis Moments at ayalashoshan.blogspot.com. 

Shalom Bayis Moments: EXTRA: Know Your Power

This is extra for this week and contains a premise for all the other recordings. Don't forget to listen to #4 in the series as well, also released today: "Upgrade Your Marriage with One Tool"  (Note: For mobile site, click on "Listen in browser".)

Shalom Bayis Moments # 4: Upgrade Your Marriage with One Tool

This one tool can make all the difference in your marriage.  When you've finished listening, follow up with this bonus recording: "Extra:  Know Your Power!"  Note: On mobile site click on "Listen in Browser"

Shalom Bayis Moments #3: The Magic Question

This is the third recording in the Shalom Bayis Moments series. Please comment below on the blog or email, call or text with questions and comments! I would love to hear from you! There is a question that can make a difference to your marriage and to all the relationships in your life. Asking it is great; answering it is even more powerful. (For mobile site, Click "Listen in Browser")

Shalom Bayis Moments #2: Own Your Happiness

Thanks for listening to the second recording of Shalom Bayis Moments. Please feel free to email me or comment below with any questions or thoughts. (On mobile site click on "Listen in Browser")

Shalom Bayis Moments #1: The Point of the Marriage Relationship

Welcome to the first recording of the Shalom Bayis Moments series.
The goal of each short recording is to leave you with a practical concept and/or tool that can be applied immediately to real life shalom bayis (marital harmony.) Please enjoy!
(Note: for mobile site click on “listen in browser”)

A Pretty Good Deal

Imagine for a minute that you knew someone who was extremely kind, giving, and helpful in every aspect of your household and life in general. He or she also had access to all kinds of resources and endless money and would love to give freely of these for you. Add to that that the person had healing powers in case anyone got sick, and was extremely caring and attentive.

How would you like to invite this guy to come live in your home?

If this “person” is sounding superhuman, its because He is!

Yet we are being offered a gift just like this in exchange for creating peace in our relationship with our spouse. If we want all of these amazing blessings in our lives, one way to get them is to create shalom, peace.

Rebbe Akiva taught us איש ואישה זכה שכינה ביניהם (sotah 17 a). A man and a woman can merit Hashem’s presence between them.

The shechina, Hashem’s presence himself, wants to live with us. He wants to be invited into our homes and make our lives wonderful. All we have to do is get along beautifuly, create peace together, and there He is, waiting to bestow every blessing on us and our family.


Today we don’t have a Bais Hamikdash, our holy temple. The bais hamikdash was unique in that it was a physical space that contained something totally spiritual. It would seem that it’s impossible for such a phenomenon to exist. Yet, it was there for us to use. It was Hashems house, so to speak, in this world.

Now that we are in exile and don’t have a holy temple, it is as if Hashem's presence is in exile too- wandering and looking for a place to rest.

We have the opportunity to “give” Hashem a home now, even without the Bais Hamikdash, in our mikdashei miat, our miniature temples, our homes.

What a beautiful concept to motivate us to do whatever it takes to make a space for Him.
Not only is that what Hashem desperately wants us to do, it also is a pretty good deal for us to have such an amazing, powerful, and kind Being living in our midst!